Life after Uganda.

AKA the calm after the storm. Kinda.

Uganda was life changing. Well, if you read my Africa blog, you'd understand. (MULTIPLE BLOGS?! Whatever, its fine... but its here. BACKPACK JOURNALISM)

We had so much fun. There was LOADS of laughter, mixed in with just about every emotion you
could think of. But mostly laughter, which is what sticks out the most. We grew to love each other. We became a family.

But how do you leave a close-knit fam like that, and come back to the first world?
It isn't easy.
Post-Africa/Class has been something that I have been struggling with. Seeing life how we live it, getting caught up in how I lived previously, but with one small difference. At random times throughout the days, I will remember faces. I will see what I remember from Africa, and wish that I could be with them. People who will probably not remember me have become a part of my daily life. All I can hope is that some day I will be able to change their life, since they have changed mine.

SPRING.

I know, I know. I'm terrible at updating this. Maybe it's because I have so much going on I don't even have time. Usually, though, it's because I forget. I'm going to try to be better, but remember when I said that in November? That worked, obviously.

Life has been... full. Full of surprises, both good and bad, and busy. It's been great, but it's also been hard. I know this sounds SUPER cliche, but believe me, if I had enough time to tell you all about everything that has been going on, you'd understand.
The biggest thing that has been happening in my life recently is still Uganda. We're just over 30 days away from what will for sure change my life. I'm SO extremely happy about it, but I'm also nervous. I don't know what is going to happen when I go abroad, but I'm really excited to figure out what is going to be happening. I mean, I've been out of the country before, but never to Africa.

We had our last meeting before we go on Thursday, and its beginning to actually feel REAL. I mean, don't get me wrong. Handing over multiple thousands to get to go on this trip made it feel real, but this was the first meeting that I felt like we're actually going to another country. We talked about what to pack and what we're going to do while we're there. It doesn't seem like its as close to coming as it is, and I'm anticipating each moment excitedly.

UGANDA?

Well, its been awhile! I've been meaning to blog for sometime now, but I never seem to have the chance to. And by that I mean I never seem to really put this first. I wish I was better at keeping up with this, so I'm going to try.
Maybe I haven't really blogged because I don't really feel like anything interesting has happened to me.

Oh wait... I'M GOING TO UGANDA!

Random, right?! Anyways, there's a backpacking journalism trip to Uganda that I really wanted to go for, and I applied this Wednesday... yesterday I got an email telling me I got the trip. The registration for the trip has already closed... CRAZY! But it is going to be the best experience of my life... I can't wait for it. Seriously. I have another semester to go before I get to go, and I am already so excited I can hardly stand it. AFRICA. I've barely been out of the country, and the next place I'm going to go is AFRICA. I'm not sure how well I'm going to handle these plane rides, but if that's my only problem, I'm okay with it. I just don't know really what to expect Uganda to be like... I mean when I think Africa I think Lion King. I think lions and elephants roaming around in the wild.( I think this is mostly because of Emmanuel and his picture holding a lion... but still) But how cool would that be?! I don't know how accurate my assumption is, but talk about an experience.

DAY 20: THE PERSON THAT BROKE YOUR HEART THE HARDEST

Hoookay. Well, its been over 3o days since I even posted last, so guess I lose the challenge. Nevertheless, as I was looking at this, I decided to finish, because, well, 19 isn't even an even number.

It's funny how in the last month and a half or so, my life has changed. I came to Omaha kind of wary about how the school year was going to go, because, let's face it, I hadn't really truly found where I belonged yet. (and by that I mean I had two great groups of friends at different times, and both times messed it up.) I felt like Omaha was missing something. This year, though, I've managed to start to figure out who I really am, and who I want to be. I love my job, my friends, and school is going pretty great as well. I'm really beginning to understand the true value of friendship, and where I can find it.

I already wrote a letter to my "ex," but to tell you the truth, I don't think this letter would even work for him. Thinking about it, I haven't really experienced heartbreak. Maybe I'm lucky, or maybe I haven't had anyone hurt me that I cared about. I have pretty great friends if that's the case. I'm a big fan of fate. I believe that everything happens for a reason, and I feel like when opportunity knocks, you're a fool if you don't open the door.

Recently, my life's been great. I have to admit, I haven't really had a hard life. But lately, I feel like I've just been coasting. Nothing great, nothing terrible. And for now, I like it like this.

Here's hoping the next letter isn't as lame :)

DAY 19: SOMEONE THAT PESTERS YOUR MIND

Well, its been awhile! Its been a super hectic week, thanks to shipping up to Omaha. Now I'm just procrastinating unpacking. This letter is going to be quite lame though. Mostly because I can't really think of anyone that really pesters my mind. I think this is because I don't really like the word "pesters." It reminds me of two things; a rooster and a festering wound. So basically, someone that pesters my mind would be someone who has a injured chicken. Luckily, I can't think of anyone who reminds me of this.

So we'll see what tomorrow entails. Now its just back to repeats of Boy Meets World.

DAY 18: THE PERSON THAT YOU WISH YOU COULD BE

These letters, while boring, do make you think. This one in particular made me think about who I am, and how I try to be the person that I can be. I know I make mistakes sometimes, but I try my best, and I think that's all anyone can ask for. I think I could try a harder to be someone who pleases everyone, but in doing that, I don't think that I would please myself. This one's kinda weird to put in letter form, but here goes...

To me,

There are many things that stick out when I think about my past, and not all of them are good things. There were many moments in which I chose the wrong path, or the way that would make me "cool." I wouldn't change a thing. I'm not saying that I'm perfect, in fact, I'm saying that I know that I'm not. I'm just saying that you can't learn to live without experiencing it. In the game of life, practice makes perfect, and boy, do I need a lot of practice!

It's sad that I have to think really hard to come up with good things or times that I have, and that shouldn't be. It's not that I don't have good qualities, and it's not that I am a pessimist, it's just that when you do something great, it's expected, whereas if you make a mistake, everyone remembers. Including yourself. How much does THAT suck?! So to me I propose a plan. I don't want to change how I am, because that wouldn't be me. Instead, I want to be a person that can be self-confident, a person that can remember when she did great things, but I also want to be a person with a little humility so that I can take it all in stride.

Self, keep doing your thing, but try to remember the good times as well. Be someone that others can love and respect, but be true to yourself.

Love, Mb

DAY 17: SOMEONE FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD

Marabeth Bryant

Its funny to think that you were a significant part of my childhood, because when I look back on it, you didn't really live in Duncanville that long. But in my young age, it seemed like I had known you my whole life. I remember bringing some dessert to your house with my mom to welcome your family to the neighborhood, and your step-mom telling me that she had a daughter my age, with a name very similar to mine! At first I was kind of like "yeah, right there's someone ELSE with a name kind of like mine." Needless to say, at that age, I still thought that my name was odd, and my parents had named me Marybeth because they didn't like me. Hey, I grew up with a sister named Katie, which was one of the most popular names I had ever heard, so by comparison, well, you get it...

Anyways, to get back to what I was saying, I'm so glad that you lived by me, even for the short time it was. I was always looking forward to the weekends that you would be in town, and you were the first person that I considered to be my best friend. I had never had someone my age live near me before, and it was always a fun treat to get to see you. We used to "meet in the middle," basically a house-and-a-half apart, and decide who's house we were going to play our Barbie CD-ROM games at.

I still think of you as the ten-year-old I knew so many years ago, and can't believe that you're now officially engaged! I'm so excited for you, and I know that you are going to have a great life. You definitely deserve it!

Maybe someday we can get together again and talk, but for now just know that I miss you! Thanks for being a significant part of my childhood!

Love, Mb